Dear Dr. Duff,

I struggle.  I never feel worthy.  I am intimidated by most every situation because I don’t believe I deserve anything.  Example, I am currently experiencing issues with my heart and blood pressure.  I can’t bring myself to get treatment.  I am overweight and have not paid attention to my health so I am pretty much reaping what I’ve sown.  How can I now turnaround and ask for help?  Not to mention that I feel like I will be ridiculed for having let myself get to this point.  It’s overwhelming and the anxiety makes it all the more difficult to do anything.  I need help.

Question 2:

Hi Duff. My name is Alex I’m 2 years and almost 8 months sober. After finding my way in recovery I was reconnected with an old friend who I hadn’t seen in almost 8 years we started dating in 2019. I moved in later that year. The pandemic brought her to working from home and fearful of leaving the house. After 2020, and at the begging of 2021 we lost her 2 dogs (1 to cancer the other too a broken heart of the loss of her sister). In June I lost my absentee father and 3 weeks later my grandfather to cancer. Now I’ve managed to stay sober and haven’t got to process all of the loss. On her end she still is so hurt over the loss of the dogs, she hates her job, how she looks and she has developed what seems to be anxiety. We are currently on a break and we both seem to be hurt on how things are right now, we miss each other and both seem to be getting in our own heads. Is there any advice you could give me on my end. I’m currently working on myself by going to my meetings and therapy but I’m really depressed. One minute I feel positive and it feels like I’m doing the right thing but all of a sudden it turns into major anxiety and fear that I’m going to lose her. Any advice you can give would be great.